Knowing Thyself

"Hello. So I finally get to meet you." An image slowly came into focus. The man looked to be in his mid to late twenties and was dressed a little oddly. He also looks familar yet it was impossibe for me to tell exactly who he was. Like the words on the tip of ones' tongue.

"Who are you?" I asked, deciding that he wouldn't be offended at the question. I don't know why, just that he wouldn't.

"I am you."

It suddenly became clear, he looked just like me. Yet a little different. My mouth though, could only managed one word. "Wha?!"

He laughed. "I am you, from another dimension."

He waited a bit for me to digest this little bit of information before continuing. "As you may have notice, we are actually in your subconciousness and you are actually asleep."

"You're just a dream?" I asked, relieved and yet disappointed at the same time.

Following a chuckle he answered with a single word. "No."

"No matter how many times I explain this, it never gets old." My-other-self I suppose mused to himself. "I'm using a device to send my conciousness into yours so that I can meet myselves."

Rather dumbstruck, I couldn't really say anything.

"There are so many variations that I dispair of ever meeting us all."

"Wh.. how are... we? I mean what are we like?" I finally found my voice. I also found all of this extremely exciting. I've always suspected there were multiple dimensions and a different version of me in, if not a lot, at least a few of them.

"Oh there will never be enough time to discribe us all." He sighed but nevertheless began to tell me about a few of them- I mean us. How he had met with very different versions of us. Those who were very young, even an infant. And those who were old, including a great-grandfather.

"There was one of us who had active psionic abilities, another who was a skilled old shadow warrior and yet another who was military advisor of the country. She was only slightly more accepting of this than you."

"Wow." That was all I could say before it hit me. "Wait. 'She'?"

He laughed, clearly amused at the expression on my face. "Yes, 'she'. Some of us were born female."

I couldn't help myself, it just blurted out. "How do we look?"

"I can only say, not too bad."

I'm pretty sure he was enjoying seeing how much curiosity this was stirring up within me. I likely would've.

"I am sure you have questions for me." He spoke after I was quiet for a while. I guess my face was more easily readable in here than in the waking world.

I was about to ask more about my female selves - I mean who wouldn't - but something made me ask something else.

"Have you spoken with everyone of us this way?"

At this question, his features became downcast. I didn't notice it until his expression changed but from the begining he was grinning from ear to ear. I wondered at this change and it soon became clear.

"No." His voice was now quieter. Not amused anymore and more sad than anything else. "Not everyone. Most of us can accept the idea of multiple dimensions. A slightly smaller number can accept that there are multiple version of us. Not all of them however, can accept the reality of meeting ourselves."

I was quiet as I twisted this fact around in my mind. For some reason I had expected that all of.. myselves were able to accept this fact. It too, made me start to feel a little sad. And a little disappointed.

"I... drove one to murder.. and another to suicide." The admission came as a shock and was deafening in the silence that had reigned for several long moments.

"The first - who was also the first one I met - decided somehow that everyone was expandable. That he could kill anyone but they were never really dead since there were others out there. It started with his brother and he had no remorse." He didn't need to say anymore. This both he and I knew and he just stopped talking.

He didn't need to say that he blamed himself for it either. I just knew that too. The 'first' was most likely locked up in an asylum. And if this me, the one infront of me now, was anything like myself, I would visit. Even without talking to him, it would serve as a reminder. And as a punishment.

"The other... could not bear with it, the knowledge that he was just one of many. Dispite the fact that we were all different and the evidence that I had showed him, he threw himself off a building."

"He survived it, I saw it as he went to sleep, at the stage when his mind was storing and remembering all that had happened that day. I did not talk to him that time, I was just too shocked. And after that look into his mind, I could not contact him again."

So he managed to kill himself. That was the only conclusion.

I was both sadden and angered at the same time.

Anger at the 'First' for treating life so callously, anger at the one in front of me for being so irresponsible and anger at myself for being angry at the one infront of me. It wasn't really his fault. As I had earlier, I had expected that all of us could accept seeing other versions of ourselves.

I also felt sad, for the two who had lost their way and for the one who had to bear the guilt.

I didn't know what to say. So I just stood there in silence for a while. I supposed he could use a hug but I wasn't raised to feel that hugs were socially acceptable. Even here, in my own mind. I began to wonder at that.

"I have to leave, you will be waking up soon." The voice cut through this latest silence.

It took a second for me to understand the announcement as preoccupied as I was. But when I did, I suddenly felt even sadder. All my life I was a loner, always wanting to be left by myself. But now that I've met another that was literally like me, the thought of being alone didn't appeal to me anymore.

"You can come back, anytime." I said the first thing on my mind. There was still so much I wanted to learn, about myselves and the worlds we live in. I also couldn't hold his mistakes against him, it wasn't right.

He looked surprised for a moment. Then he smiled and gave me a thumbs up before he faded from view. It wasn't the same happy-smug grin he had at the begining. This smile was one of thanks.

Seeing that made me feel better. He'll be back.

And maybe he'll start to forgive himself.


Then, I woke up.